Holiday Expectations - Keeping It Real

 It’s that time of year when expectations run high… but they often don’t quite measure-up to reality. 

This holiday season is different for sure... Travel is being discouraged, gathering to share a meal with multi generations is frowned upon, and many do not have the additional resources to spare for lavish presents and overindulgences. 

We all have unmet expectations when it comes to Christmas.  

Now might be a good time to reevaluate what is really important this Christmas.  Faith, family and charity are my favorite things to focus on during this time of year. Here is my take on each of them:Christmas. 

FAITH -   Jesus is certainly the Reason for the Season. The babe in the manger born in Bethlehem came into this world to fulfill prophesy foretold long ago of a Savior – Christ the Lord.  He is our Prince of Peace during times of turmoil and uncertainty.  Jesus is the “indescribable gift” from the Father above.

(II Corinthians 9:15).

FAMILY -   Now there is a “loaded” subject.  We all have them, but sometimes we don't like them very much.  Often during family gatherings tensions arise between siblings, parents and children, and spouses.  Every family has their danger zone when it comes to relationship pitfalls.  Placing unrealistic expectations on your family can cause depression, anxiety, and anger.  Be sure bathe your holidays in prayer.  Extend grace where needed and use self-control liberally.

CHARITY -  Nothing makes you feel better than meeting a need and helping someone less fortunate than yourself.  Giving emulates the character of Jesus.  This is the season for gift giving and donating your time, energy and finances to worthy causes.  Share with others what the Lord has blessed you with. Remember, it is not the size of your gift – but the heart motive that matters.

Oftentimes family gatherings are a flashpoint for tensions.  

First of all - we likely don't have a perfect family - who does?  It might be stressful to deal with an ex-spouse or ex-in-laws.  Many people deal with new dynamics in a blended family. Things don’t always go as planned, so be sure to stay flexible and non-confrontational if possible.  Extend grace to others.  Don’t assume wrong motives.  Allow extra time for yourself in order to avoid a melt-down in the middle of cooking, cleaning and socializing with your extended family.  Ask others to help with food preparation, gift-wrapping, decorating and cleanup.

Give yourself permission to “let something go” that was on your to-do list without the guilt. Every year isn’t going to be a Norman Rockwell Christmas – and that is OKAY.   Recognize that not everyone is going to want to do what you want to do at Christmastime.  Give and take is essential with a large family as much as it is with a small one.  Feelings will get hurt and toes will get stepped on.  It’s OKAY.  Focus on the major things and don’t fret over the minor things.  Making memories that will last is honorable – but not at the expense of your sanity or your relationships.

Enjoy the journey. Keep your sanity by maintaining some boundaries.  Get plenty of rest, eat right, and exercise to keep yourself healthy and mentally balanced. Slow down...

Remember – JESUS is the Reason for the Season.  Everything else is just filler...

Deborah is the author of a Christian non-fiction book titled “Mission Possible”. It was written for women who love the Lord Jesus, but their spouse doesn’t share their passion.  It will encourage and challenge the reader to embrace God’s promises for their spouse and future together.   Visit  http://www.spirituallyunevenmarriage.com

 If you have been encouraged by this post - please take time to share it with others.

Holiday Expectations - Keeping It Real

A Valentine for Eternity

As women, Valentine’s Day is an opportunity to take the extra steps to make sure that your husband, boyfriend, Dad, son, or any other important man in your life is made to feel very special. We are givers by nature, and we put much thought and energy into doing just the right things to show our love for them.

Concerning your husband - there is always the traditional candy, heart-felt greeting card, and favorite meal to appease them. But sometimes we just need to do more. If you are craft prone, you can create something unique for their office or man-cave. You might get them a gift card to their favorite “big-boys toy store” or let them know you’re taking them out for dinner! You can offer to go to a movie of their choosing, or buy them a half-hour massage at the local spa. The choices are endless.

All those things are great – but do you know what I bet they would really like? Okay, we already know what “we think they want”, but that’s not all that is on their mind.  I really believe they would like a straight-from-the-heart acknowledgement of how glad you are that you married them to begin with! Give them a “look in the eye” honest thank-you for all that you’ve been through together. Men desire our respect and love. Tell them that you’d marry them all over again – that they are just what God designed for you!  I Corinthians 13 is deemed the "love" chapter and is often quoted in weddings. Here is a post I did titled: Love Isn't Just for Valentine's Day

Ephesians 5 commands us to walk in love towards one another. The Apostle Paul is teaching on submitting to one another in the fear of God (verse 21). Husbands are admonished to love their wives just as Christ loved the church. The great mystery Paul talks about not only has to do with the “leaving and cleaving” in a physical holy union between and man and woman, but also of Christ and His Church. We leave the world and cleave unto Him. We forsake all others for our heavenly Husband. We are His alone. Just as Israel played the harlot and was unfaithful to God, we too can become “unfaithful” in our marriage concerning our allegiance. Our earthly husband is our gift from above – our completer, not our competitor. God wants our focus to be on our spouse and our marriage. That is our highest calling.

Paul’s last point in Ephesians 5 is, “Let each one of you in particular so love his own wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband.” The point of it is this: women generally have no problem “loving” – but they often have difficulty “respecting” their husband. Honor and respect goes a long way in forging a lasting, healthy and biblical relationship. This applies whether you are both Christians, or if you are unequally-yoked in your marriage. God wills that the wife respect her husband. Here is my post on this touchy subject: Respect: Who Needs It? (Part 1)

Peter lays out God’s perfect plan of submission with regards to women in marriage. I Peter 3 states, “Likewise you wives, be submissive to your own husbands, that even if some do not obey the word, they, without a word, may be won by the conduct of their wives, when they observe your chaste conduct accompanied by fear [respect]."  Trusting God and His character is the key to showing respect to your spouse, even when it’s undeserved. God will honor your heart and motive. I wrote a blog post on Biblical submission here: Oh No - Not the "S" Word

On a personal note – do I always do everything just right? No way, not by any stretch of the imagination. Do my husband and I have ups and downs in our 36 year marriage? You bet! However, I learned early on in my Christian walk to show respect to my husband, even when I felt he didn’t deserve it. I don’t chide him in public, or belittle him in front of others. Just as a couple walking along the beach, love and respect go hand in hand.

When I first met my husband, he had a little garden area off of his patio at his apartment. He grew a variety of roses varying in color and size. I have always loved roses. That first day we met he presented me with a lovely single dark red rose. Throughout the years, I have received red roses on special occasions (one being the birth of our son), but more often than not – I have yearly received beautiful cards for Valentine’s Day displaying red roses on it.

What has touched my heart more than anything else over the years, has been a consistent hand-written note in the card saying that he loved me, and thanking God for me! This gesture of love comes from a man who has yet to make Jesus Christ the Lord of his life. I’m thankful that he sees the heart of God in me. How very humbling… To God be all the Glory!

    A Little History About Valentine’s Day -

Valentine greetings were popular as far back as the Middle Ages (written Valentines didn't begin to appear until after 1400), and the 

oldest known Valentine card is on display at the British Museum. 

The first commercial Valentine's Day greeting cards produced 

in the U.S. were created in the 1840s by Esther A. Howland.

Deborah is the author of a Christian non-fiction book titled “Mission Possible”. It was written for women who love the Lord Jesus, but their spouse doesn’t share their passion.  It will encourage and challenge the reader to embrace God’s promises for their spouse and future together.  Visit  http://www.spirituallyunevenmarriage.com

If you have been encouraged by this post - please take time to share it with others.

A Valentine for Eternity

5 Things to do While You Wait on God...

Waiting... It's not our favorite thing to do.

When you give your life to the Lord, you want everyone else in your household and family to do the same - at least that is how I felt.

I was the first one in my family to accept Jesus Christ as my Lord and Savior in a public setting.  My mother has a deep faith and belief in God, but I never really comprehended what that meant growing up.  My father wasn't interested in church attendance or the things of God. My sister is still resistant to God and religion in general.

When my husband and I married, we were both unbelievers. Seven years later I had a powerful conversion experience that had real consequences. There were immediate changes in my behavior, thoughts and heart. I wrote a blog post about how to tell if the experience is real or not:  A Bona Fide Convert

So - what came next?  WAITING...

Here is an excerpt from my book  MISSION POSSIBLE  -  Chapter 6  "In the Meantime - Serve"
     

During your time of "waiting on the Lord" (Psalm 27:14), you must be courageous. This is not a time for whimpering and whining. This is a time to dig in and serve - and a time to dig trenches and fortify your position in Christ regarding your mate. The enemy is stealthy and clever in distraction regarding your mission. He will try to divert your energy and resources into other areas that might be good, but not GOD's best! Be careful with too many church activities and over commitment. Remember, your spouse does not understand your need to serve the kingdom purposes. They just don't understand it. Balance is crucial when it comes to home, church, and work. Pray that God will prepare your husband's heart and give you that understanding and favor regarding your "God assignments".

5 Things to do While You Wait on God...

1.    Pray for your spouse -
      
        Praying for your spouse is powerful and helps you to see their spiritual darkness as God sees it. One of the Scriptures I pray for my husband is Ephesians 1:17-19 , "...that the God of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of glory, may give to you the spirit of wisdom and revelation in the knowledge of Him, the eyes of your understanding being enlightened; that you may know what is the hope of His calling, what are the riches of the glory of His inheritance in the saints, and what is the exceeding greatness of His power toward us who believe, according to the working of His mighty power."

Another one is Romans 10:20 , "But Isaiah is very bold and says: 'I was found by those who did not seek Me; I was made manifest to those who did not ask for Me."

2.    Sow seeds for a harvest -

        Go ahead and plant seed.  Share the basics of the Gospel in a loving, sensitive way.  The worst thing you can do is to "preach to them" and point out glaring faults in a legalistic way.  Unless they have had their heart regenerated - it won't make any sense to them.  Remember, they are spiritually blind. I Corinthians 2:14 says "But the natural man does not receive the things of the Spirit of God, for they are foolishness to him; nor can he know them, because they are spiritually discerned."

3.    Remember it is God who draws them -

        You are not "Holy Spirit Jr." - so don't try so hard to make it happen. God is the one who initiates the wooing of their spirit man. Hosea 11:4 says, "I drew them with gentle cords, with bands of love, and I was to them as those who take the yoke from their neck. I stooped and fed them." Jesus says in John 6:44, "No one can come to Me unless the Father who sent Me draws him..."

4.    Live as a witness -

        In order to be a witness, you have to emulate Jesus' characteristics and desire what he desires. The fruit of the Spirit in Galatians 5:22-23 are the attributes we should be displaying if we are living a life hid in Christ Jesus. He says this in John 15:5, "I am the vine, you are the branches. He who abides in Me, and I in him, bears much fruit; for without Me you can do nothing."

5.    Have patience and perseverance -

         Hebrews 11:1 says, "Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen." Our faith in God and hope in His Word give us the strength and endurance we need to "keep on keeping on".  God's perfect plan may be an immediate salvation experience or it may be years away. Either way - wouldn't you rejoice in your mate's conversion - even if that meant waiting for the right time, place, and situation? Don't give up... God is moving in the background and arranging things we don't even know about yet.  

Jesus tells us in Luke 18:-8, "Then the Lord said, 'Hear what the unjust judge said, And shall God not avenge His own elect who cry out day and night to Him, though He bears long with them? I tell you that He will avenge them speedily. Nevertheless, when the Son of Man comes, will He really find faith on the earth?"


Waiting on the Lord can renew your strength and fortify your hope. Rest in Him as you wait...

Deborah is the author of a Christian non-fiction book titled “Mission Possible”. It is written for women who love the Lord Jesus, but their spouse doesn’t share their passion.  It will encourage and challenge the reader to embrace God’s promises for their spouse and future together. 

Visit  http://www.spirituallyunevenmarriage.com

If you have been encouraged by this post - please take time to share it with others.

5 Things to do While You Wait on God...

What Does a Spiritual Mom Look Like?

We all have a sphere of influence.  It might be at home, at work, or in our neighborhood. 

As Christian women, we often encounter people and situations that beckon us to interact as Godly examples and mentors.

The Apostle Paul was writing to Titus (his true son in the faith) to remind him to appoint elders (overseers) in every town. The growing church needed leadership and direction. It needed mature believers to mentor and train-up fellow believers in their day to day walk with God.

How does that apply to us - women of faith - Moms, Grandmothers, Aunts, Sisters, and Wives...

Titus 2:3-5 says this: "...They [older women] are to teach what is good, so they may encourage the young women to love their husbands and to love their children, to be self-controlled, pure, homemakers, kind, and submissive to their husbands, so that God's message will not be slandered."



Part of the charge to women in particular is to love their husbands and be submissive to them, so that God's message and His name would not be slandered.  Submission is a word that many women run from - but that is not necessary.  Find out why in a blog post I wrote about submission here:

Oh No... Not the "S" Word

For those of us who have children and grandchildren, being MOM to our adult kids never really ends.Our influence might evolve and morph into more of a "support" role. If you are like most Moms, you still give unsolicited advice and occasionally do one of those irritating Mom things. However, our adult children are no less needy and deserving of our time, energy and wisdom than when they were young. Now, more than ever, we need to mentor them and guide them into greater spiritual truth. They will make their own choices and live with those consequences. We are to pray for them and their walk with God.

If you are a mature Christian - both in years and experience - you have something to offer younger women! 

Not every woman will teach Sunday School or lead a Bible study at church, but you can reach a new generation with the powerful message of the gospel of Jesus Christ. How can you be involved in mentoring a young woman?  What practical steps can you take?

You can devote your time, energy and encouragement to her. You can be available to talk and offer Biblical counsel. You can offer assistance with child care, errands, and life skills. You can meet for Bible study, devotions, and prayer time. The list is endless... be creative!

My former daughter-in-law recently gave her life to Jesus and was baptized with my granddaughter. She is truly a new creation in Christ. This was a young lady that had absolutely no interest in living a Christian lifestyle when she met and married our son (who was not walking with the Lord). Growing up, she had been raised in church and attended a Catholic school - but as many young people do - she wandered away from God's truth.

I now have the honor and privilege of being a mentor and a spiritual Mom to her. It has been exhilarating and exhausting - all at the same time. Our emotions peak and fall like a ride on a roller-coaster at times, but I know deep in my heart God can get us through it together. We are family, and we always will be...

For those of you who are in an unequally-yoked marriage and still have young children living in your home - here is the link to a wonderful resource by Lynn Donovan and Dineen Miller titled:

Not Alone: Trusting God to Help You Raise Godly Kids in a Spiritually Mismatched Home

On a personal side note - since my Dad passed away two years ago, my mother and I make it a point to meet for dinner every Thursday night after she gets her hair done.  She still drives (for now) and relishes her liberty. I'm so thankful we can enjoy each other's company and can be a spiritual support for each other.

Enjoy your Mom if you still have her. Thank God for His Word and Biblical pattern for being a spiritual Mom to someone special in your life.

Deborah is the author of a Christian non-fiction book titled “Mission Possible”. It is written for women who love the Lord Jesus, but their spouse doesn’t share their passion.  It will encourage and challenge the reader to embrace God’s promises for their spouse and future together. 

Visit  http://www.spirituallyunevenmarriage.com

If you have been encouraged by this post - please take time to share it with others.

What Does a Spiritual Mom Look Like?

A Spiritual "Tug-O-War"

Do you feel as though you are in a spiritual tug-o-war? 

When you are living in an unequally-yoked marriage, there will be times when you feel as though you are being pulled in two different directions...

Do you struggle as I do with everyday occurrences that remind you of a scene in "Clash of the Titans"?  This epic story of good versus evil is found in many books, movies and fairy tales. So how does that correlate to a spiritually mismatched marriage?  

The Apostle Paul appeals to believers in II Corinthians 6:14 as follows: "Do not be unequally yoked together with unbelievers. For what fellowship has righteousness with lawlessness? And what communion has light with darkness?"  His main focus was on everyday life choices including friendships, commerce and social activities. Christians are supposed to be separated unto the Lord to maintain a witness to an unsaved world.

However, he also lays out Godly principles in I Corinthians 7:10-16 regarding believers married to non-believers. He sums up with this: "For how do you know, O wife, whether you will save your husband? Or how do you know, O husband, whether you will save your wife?" 

Just remember this... ... He who is in you is greater than he who is in the world (I John 4:4). 

First and foremost we must maintain our connection with Jesus Christ and feed our spiritual man [woman]. The world contends for our attention. This quote from C.H. Spurgeon's "Morning and Evening" says it all:  "It is the incessant turmoil of the world, the constant attraction of earthly things, that takes the soul away from Christ".

Be sure that you make time to charge your spiritual battery. You need to stay in fellowship with Jesus in order to live a Christ-centered life at home. Here is one of my Blog posts from the past that explains what I mean:  Exercise Profits Nothing

Next, don't view your spouse as the enemy. Remember they don't yet know the Lord as you do. They are spiritually "dead" to the things of God. In my book MISSION POSSIBLE - Chapter 2 The "Abigail Syndrome", I explain it this way:

"The world does make man like stone and cold to the things of God. Pray for your husband as in Ezekiel 36:26: "I will give you a new heart and put a new spirit within you; I will take the heart of stone out of your flesh and give you a heart of flesh."  His spiritual death needs to be recognized by his flesh. When your husband dies to himself, it will be so God can raise him up with "resurrection power" to be the Godly priest of your home [God] intended!"  Copyright © Deborah McCarragher and God Mission Possible, 2010-2015 

Lastly, dwell with your mate in harmony as much as is possible. When my husband wants to watch something on TV that "grates" on my spirit, I just go upstairs to my office and watch something else. Having a heated discussion on what he wants to watch versus what I want to watch only leads to further division. We watch plenty of TV together - so I've learned to choose my battles carefully. 

Do what you can to live in peace. Give and take. Hold your tongue. Defer to your spouse's choices when practical and wait for an appropriate time to discuss your concerns. I wrote a Blog post on this subject here: Can't We All Just Get Along?

If you think you're going to "blow a gasket" - go for a walk. Step into another room and say an SOS prayer. Make provision for quality time for yourself. That way you'll be less likely to react in a dishonorable way.

Don't let the "tug-o-war" become a win or lose scenario. You can win by letting God have His way in your life and peace in your home.

Deborah is the author of a Christian non-fiction book titled “Mission Possible”. It is written for women who love the Lord Jesus, but their spouse doesn’t share their passion.  It will encourage and challenge the reader to embrace God’s promises for their spouse and future together. 

Visit  http://www.spirituallyunevenmarriage.com

If you have been encouraged by this post - please take time to share it with others.

A Spiritual "Tug-O-War"

Are You "Missing In Action" ?

There’s nothing worse than missing church and feeling guilty. Well, that is what the enemy wants me to focus on.

I have had an unusual situation arise since my husband had back surgery in mid-May.  We have two large dogs that require a morning walk.  Now that we have downsized to a condo, we no longer have a yard to let them out. We have to take them outside on leash and walk for a while. I have created my own monsters by walking them every morning – thus they expect it! (weather permitting)  However, my husband cannot physically take them on their walk alone until his back gets stronger.

So – the enemy has taken great delight in making me feel like a backslidden Christian for missing church for so long. You and I know that is baloney – but it does affect your thinking nonetheless.

My husband generally does not attend church with me.  During my hiatus from my local church I have fallen prey to the idea that I am a bad Christian – a slacker for staying home.  Of course, there have been many instances where I read my devotionals and listened to sermons online, did personal Bible study, or walked and talked to the Lord instead. 

My being a Christian has more to do with my mind, my heart and my relationship with my Savior than it does with church attendance.  

I have a personal relationship with Jesus - not religion.  I wrote a Blog post about this subject and you can read it here:   It's All About a Relationship With Jesus

Ministering to my husband and meeting his needs right now are more important to me (and certainly to the Lord) than my desire to be in church for my own pleasure and fulfillment. Don’t get me wrong, I worry about staying away from the fold too long.  I don’t want to be complacent about missing the fellowship, Sunday school time, and corporate worship.  My spiritual gifts are needed in my local church.

However, I know that there is a season for everything, and I will make my way back to the flock soon.  I have already signed up for a Ladies Bible Study group starting up in August when school is back in session.  I really miss my woman to woman time in God’s Word with God's people.

In the meantime, I am struggling to find my own balance between quiet time and husband time.  Since his retirement I have struggled to get into some type of daily routine with the Lord. 

But alas, flexibility is the key to harmony within a spiritually mismatched marriage.  There are many times I just have to go with the flow and plug into Jesus when I can do it.

Here is a brief excerpt from my book MISSION POSSIBLE:

Chapter 6 ~  In the Meantime - Serve

Balance is crucial when  it comes to home, church, and work.  Pray that God will prepare their hearts and give you that understanding and favor regarding “God assignments”.  Use  spiritual sensitivity  and  discernment  when it comes to volunteering yourself for everything that comes your way at church.  

God will affirm to you the “right things to do”, and conversely, He will squelch those things which are “wrong” for you at the time.  You must stay in touch with God on a daily basis through prayer, reading the Word, and the Spirit’s leading  in order to know His will for you and your household.   

There were many times I would talk to my husband, asking him if he would mind if I went to a conference, or took a class, or volunteered for a project.  I believe respect went a long way…  He knew if he really didn’t want me to do something (within reason),  that I would decline.  However,  if God made it clear to me that I “must” do something for Him,  I would risk the flow of harmony in the home and pursue it with gentle love and understanding.

Do you struggle with similar circumstances in your marriage? Do you find yourself reeling in guilt because you missed another church service? Will God understand again this time?

Oh yes… He understands.  He knows your heart’s cry and your deep desires.  He extends His mercy where pain and heaviness resides.  He is ready to infuse you with His Spirit and enfold you in His grace.

 

Deborah is the author of a Christian non-fiction book titled “Mission Possible”. It is written for women who love the Lord Jesus, but their spouse doesn’t share their passion.  It will encourage and challenge the reader to embrace God’s promises for their spouse and future together. 

Visit  http://www.spirituallyunevenmarriage.com

If you have been encouraged by this post - please take time to share it with others.

Are You "Missing In Action" ?

A Bona Fide Convert

Salvation:  deliverance from the power and effects of sin.

If any man be in Christ, he is a new creature; old things are passed away; behold, all things are become new.”  

(II Corinthians 5:17)

If you ask a handful of people to define what a “Christian” is – you’ll get a variety of answers. Some say if you attend church you’re a Christian.  Others think if your parents and grandparents were Christians, then you are a Christian by birth right.  You might know someone who thinks being baptized or dedicated as a child qualifies you to be a Christian.  There are churches full of people who believe they are Christians, yet don’t follow His commandments or know Him intimately.  Pastors, choir members, Sunday school teachers and deacons have made public professions of faith after they have spent their entire lives in church.

There should be a time in your life where you can clearly point to an event or a private moment that changed you forever:  your genuine conversion experience with the Lord Jesus Christ.

So, what does it look like?  You begin to fall in love with God’s Word.  You desire to spend more time with His people.  You care less and less about the world’s system and its allure.  You have a tender heart towards things that move the heart of God, and you begin to live to please Him – not others.

Let’s be clear… a Christian is a Christ follower.  In order to follow Christ, you have to make a decision to do so.  But this is the best part – Christ chooses you!  He seeks you out and invites you to accept His gift of salvation.  Jesus says, "No one can come to Me unless the Father who sent Me draws him" (John 6:44).

God saves men by His sovereign grace through the Atonement of Jesus.  He works in us to will and to do of His good pleasure; but we have to work out that salvation in practical living... The experience of salvation means that in your actual life things are really altered, you no longer look at things as you used to; your desires are new, old things have lost their power…It is this complete and amazing alteration that is the evidence that you are a saved soul.    ~ Oswald Chambers [My Utmost for His Highest]

Below is an excerpt from my book  MISSION POSSIBLE

Chapter 7   “Victory at Last!”  

            Jesus said to him, “Thomas, because you have seen Me, you have believed.  Blessed are those who have not seen and yet have believed.” 

            My husband needs to have that personal revelation of Jesus where there is no doubt that He is real!  When he has a profession of faith that rivals that of Thomas in scripture, that will be a day of celebration in heaven (and on earth).  His eternal salvation will be secured and the “head knowledge” will be replaced with the “heart knowledge”.  Remember Romans 10:20?  That is “his” verse; “I was found by those who did not seek Me; I was manifest to those who did not ask for Me.”

Mission Possible is a book for women living in an unequally-yoked marriage. It offers the reader hope and encouragement using God's Word and applying Biblical truths.  Copyright © Deborah McCarragher 2009-2019.

I'm waiting and hopeful that my husband will truly be converted as a disciple of Christ.  


After 30 years of being unequally-yoked in marriage, I'm longing for spiritual intimacy and the opportunity to grow old together - serving the Lord.  I cannot see into my husband's heart, but I do know that there will be evidences of a real conversion.  I am a fruit inspector, not a fruit cultivator. Only Jesus brings forth the fruit.  

Here is a passage from the Message translation that testifies to a true believer...

This is how we know we’re living steadily and deeply in him, and he in us: He’s given us life from his life, from his very own Spirit.  Also, we’ve seen for ourselves and continue to state openly that the Father sent his Son as Savior of the world.  Everyone who confesses that Jesus is God’s Son participates continuously in an intimate relationship with God.  We know it so well, we’ve embraced it heart and soul, this love that comes from God.   [I John 4:13-15  MSG]

Hold fast to your hope - do not waiver.  Let your faith rise to the occasion.  Believe in God's ability to reach your husband's soul.  Don't give up...

Deborah is the author of a Christian non-fiction book titled “Mission Possible”.  It is written for women who love the Lord Jesus, but their spouse doesn’t share their passion.  It will encourage and challenge the reader to embrace God’s promises for their spouse and future together.  Visit

http://www.spirituallyunevenmarriage.com

A Bona Fide Convert

New Year's Resolutions for a Happy Anniversary!

It’s a brand new year and the start of a new decade in our marriage.  We are celebrating our 30^th wedding anniversary today – January 2^nd, 2012.   

I must preface it by saying this is my 2^nd marriage.  I got married right out of high school and was divorced 4 yrs. later.  I remarried at the age of 26, and 7 years into our marriage I accepted Jesus Christ as my Lord and Savior.

As I look back over our marital journey, I recognize the ups and downs, the good, bad and ugly, and the day to day struggles that form the bond of commitment we still share today.  I pledged to the Lord that this year I would write out a list of “30 Things I Love Most About My Husband” and include it in his anniversary card.  That’s one good character trait or quality for every year of marriage!

When I met the Lord Jesus personally, it changed my life forever.  Since that time I have grown in my faith and have learned that my personal happiness is rooted and grounded in the love of Christ.  I’ve come to realize that my husband cannot meet all of my needs and expectations.  Only Jesus Christ can bring true joy and contentment in life.  I choose not to dwell on the negative – but rather focus on the positive.

I Peter 3:1-4 says, “Likewise you wives, be submissive to your own husbands, that even if some do not obey the word, they, without a word, may be won by the conduct of their wives, when they observe your chase conduct accompanied by fear. Do not let your beauty be that outward adorning of arranging the hair, of wearing gold, or of putting on fine apparel; but let it be the hidden person of the heart, with the incorruptible ornament of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is very precious in the sight of God.”

Now for the good stuff!  I hereby celebrate my husband of thirty years with this list of the       

 “30 Things I Love Most About My Husband"

1. Funny
2. Romantic
3. Generous           
4. Careful
5. Sacrificial
6. Organized
7. Mindful
8. Hard-working
9. Descent
10. Honest
11. Wise
12. Punctual
13. Devoted
14. Considerate
15. Dependable
16. Loving
17. Courageous
18. Diligent
19. Steady
20. Giving
21. Helpful
22. Trustworthy
23. Optimistic
24. Tidy
25.  Humble
26. Compassionate
27. Honorable
28. Wise
29. Determined
30. Intelligent 

 This was a photo of us while on a cruise last year in Europe - a once in a lifetime memory!

Deborah is the author of a Christian non-fiction book titled “Mission Possible”.  It is written for women who love the Lord Jesus, but their spouse doesn’t share their passion.  It will encourage and challenge the reader to embrace God’s promises for their spouse and future together.  Visit

http://www.spirituallyunevenmarriage.com

New Year's Resolutions for a Happy Anniversary!