Are You "Missing In Action" ?

There’s nothing worse than missing church and feeling guilty. Well, that is what the enemy wants me to focus on.

I have had an unusual situation arise since my husband had back surgery in mid-May.  We have two large dogs that require a morning walk.  Now that we have downsized to a condo, we no longer have a yard to let them out. We have to take them outside on leash and walk for a while. I have created my own monsters by walking them every morning – thus they expect it! (weather permitting)  However, my husband cannot physically take them on their walk alone until his back gets stronger.

So – the enemy has taken great delight in making me feel like a backslidden Christian for missing church for so long. You and I know that is baloney – but it does affect your thinking nonetheless.

My husband generally does not attend church with me.  During my hiatus from my local church I have fallen prey to the idea that I am a bad Christian – a slacker for staying home.  Of course, there have been many instances where I read my devotionals and listened to sermons online, did personal Bible study, or walked and talked to the Lord instead. 

My being a Christian has more to do with my mind, my heart and my relationship with my Savior than it does with church attendance.  

I have a personal relationship with Jesus - not religion.  I wrote a Blog post about this subject and you can read it here:   It's All About a Relationship With Jesus

Ministering to my husband and meeting his needs right now are more important to me (and certainly to the Lord) than my desire to be in church for my own pleasure and fulfillment. Don’t get me wrong, I worry about staying away from the fold too long.  I don’t want to be complacent about missing the fellowship, Sunday school time, and corporate worship.  My spiritual gifts are needed in my local church.

However, I know that there is a season for everything, and I will make my way back to the flock soon.  I have already signed up for a Ladies Bible Study group starting up in August when school is back in session.  I really miss my woman to woman time in God’s Word with God's people.

In the meantime, I am struggling to find my own balance between quiet time and husband time.  Since his retirement I have struggled to get into some type of daily routine with the Lord. 

But alas, flexibility is the key to harmony within a spiritually mismatched marriage.  There are many times I just have to go with the flow and plug into Jesus when I can do it.

Here is a brief excerpt from my book MISSION POSSIBLE:

Chapter 6 ~  In the Meantime - Serve

Balance is crucial when  it comes to home, church, and work.  Pray that God will prepare their hearts and give you that understanding and favor regarding “God assignments”.  Use  spiritual sensitivity  and  discernment  when it comes to volunteering yourself for everything that comes your way at church.  

God will affirm to you the “right things to do”, and conversely, He will squelch those things which are “wrong” for you at the time.  You must stay in touch with God on a daily basis through prayer, reading the Word, and the Spirit’s leading  in order to know His will for you and your household.   

There were many times I would talk to my husband, asking him if he would mind if I went to a conference, or took a class, or volunteered for a project.  I believe respect went a long way…  He knew if he really didn’t want me to do something (within reason),  that I would decline.  However,  if God made it clear to me that I “must” do something for Him,  I would risk the flow of harmony in the home and pursue it with gentle love and understanding.

Do you struggle with similar circumstances in your marriage? Do you find yourself reeling in guilt because you missed another church service? Will God understand again this time?

Oh yes… He understands.  He knows your heart’s cry and your deep desires.  He extends His mercy where pain and heaviness resides.  He is ready to infuse you with His Spirit and enfold you in His grace.

 

Deborah is the author of a Christian non-fiction book titled “Mission Possible”. It is written for women who love the Lord Jesus, but their spouse doesn’t share their passion.  It will encourage and challenge the reader to embrace God’s promises for their spouse and future together. 

Visit  http://www.spirituallyunevenmarriage.com

If you have been encouraged by this post - please take time to share it with others.

Are You "Missing In Action" ?

Mom, you DO have the greatest influence on your children...

Statistically, women who attend church alone with their children are on the rise. 

Women’s Sunday school classes are flourishing. Why is this trend so prevalent across the spectrum of Christian denominations? Theories range from the lack of strong, spiritual leadership by the husband in the home, to absentee fathers, to women being more open to the spiritual things of God. No matter the reasons, women make up a larger percentage of regular attendance in most churches – oftentimes alone, with their children in tow.

Barna, a popular Christian research group had this to say, “Moms are more religiously active. In a typical week, mothers are more likely than are fathers to attend church, pray, read the Bible, participate in a small group, attend Sunday school, and volunteer some of their time to help a non-profit organization. Women in America have high levels of spiritual sensitivity and engagement.” 

As a new Christian, I was eager to go to church – and at first, it was just my young son and myself. My husband wasn’t interested in going with us. I had made a decision for Christ, and I intended to keep it! We attended most services and enjoyed the fellowship with other believers.  Just remember, your conversion is personal. It is a revelation given to you, and you alone. God draws us by His Spirit, and we follow Him into our relationship one by one. There are no family conversions, except each member responds individually to God’s invitation (Acts 16:31-34) Here is a post I wrote concerning true salvation  A Bona Fide Convert

In scripture, there are several examples of mothers who influenced their children by being Godly examples. One of my favorites is Hannah, the mother of Samuel, who became a great prophet to Israel. I Samuel 1-2 tell us that Samuel was an answer to prayer, and a gift of faith to his mother. Hannah had only a short time to shape his understanding of who God was. She had made a vow to the Lord to dedicate him to God’s service. She would wean him and leave him with Eli the priest to serve at the temple in Shiloh. Hannah, no doubt, spent much time with young Samuel, sharing her love of God and the nation’s historical narrative as any mom would – in story-telling. She most likely prayed with him and sang hymns. She most likely shared age-appropriate things with him regarding sacred religious feasts, festivals and rituals. Samuel grew up before the Lord and pleased Him in his service. Even at a young age Samuel heard God’s voice, which was rare in those days. God used him mightily, and according to God’s leadership and direction, he became the kingmaker, anointing both Saul and David.

Another great example of a mother’s influence is in II Timothy 1:5. Paul recalls Timothy’s upbringing by his mother Eunice, and his grandmother, Lois. The name Timothy means “honoring God,” and it was probably given to him by his mother. Timothy was born in the province of Galatia, the offspring of a mixed marriage between a Greek father and a Jewish mother (Acts 16:1). While growing up, Timothy was taught the Scriptures by his believing mother and grandmother. He certainly sang hymns, participated in Christian first century practices and traditions, and learned the power of prayer from his Godly role models. He was most likely led to Christ by Paul, later circumcised by him, and was Paul’s missionary companion for much of the rest of his ministry. Paul later considers Timothy to be his closest disciple, and often referred to him as his “son in the faith”.

While you are serving the Lord at church, be mindful of your spouse and home situation. Be discerning, not disruptive. Walk in love and wisdom. Approach your new found faith with enthusiasm, but give yourself permission to “stay at home” on occasion for a family outing or special time together. Be a Godly role model to your children, but don’t use your church attendance or them as a form of punishment against your spouse and their lack of interest.

Pray with your children for your spouse in a way that honors them and glorifies God. Lift them up to Him in a loving, meaningful way, that your children may see your devotion them, and your genuine concern for their salvation (all age-appropriate, of course). Provide spiritual nourishment to your children by memorizing simple scripture verses, reading bible stories, and talking about what God is doing in your life on a daily basis. Always be ready to use everyday situations as “teaching moments”.

Proverbs 22:6 says, “Train up a child in the way he should go, and when he is old, he will not depart from it.” There is no guarantee that your children will serve the Lord all their days, but there is no doubt that using your influence for Christ, at any age, will certainly sow seed for others to water, and for God to bring the increase…

My book "Mission Possible" addresses many difficulties in an unequally-yoked marriage.  You can preview my book here:  AMAZON

Deborah is the author of a Christian non-fiction book titled “Mission Possible”. It was written for women who love the Lord Jesus, but their spouse doesn’t share their passion.  It will encourage and challenge the reader to embrace God’s promises for their spouse and future together. 

Visit  http://www.spirituallyunevenmarriage.com

If you have been encouraged by this post - please take time to share it with others.

Mom, you DO have the greatest influence on your children...