You need to check your eye --- I think I see a speck...

"I bet he is enjoying the fact that I made a mistake!" I thought to myself. 

How often do I imagine the wrong response and correlating reason for it?

We all do it - married or not... We play Holy Spirit junior (as it were) in an attempt to filter someone else's actions through our own imperfect lens.

The following passage in Matthew 7:1-5 is a familiar one. Jesus Himself is calling out the hypocrites in the crowd. He is teaching on judging others. It is one of the most misunderstood and misinterpreted scripture references:
     
"Judge not, that you be not judged. For with what judgment you judge, you will be judged; and with the same measure you use, it will be measured back to you.  And why do you look at the speck in your brother's eye, but do not consider the plank in your own eye?  Or how can you say to your brother, 'Let me remove the speck out of your eye'; and look, a plank is in your own eye?  Hypocrite! First remove the plank from your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck out of your brother's eye."

There is only one Righteous Judge. When we judge another according to our own standards - we invite the same standard used against us.  Reaping and sowing is an eternal law.  How foolish of us to think that we can withstand judgment according to our own making!  There is a time for judgment with regards to a believer when they are in sin.  The bible devotes passages to church discipline and admonishment. Jesus' own words appear in Matthew 18:15-17.

We think we know why people do or say what  they do or say.  We play amateur clinical psychologist and do a quick analysis of their actions.  We filter their words through our own auditory prism instead of a grace filled ear.  We must be careful when we overextend our comments and thoughts - especially in our marriage.

Oftentimes we are guilty of actually judging their motives - not their actions.  That in and of itself is dangerous, and is outright unspiritual in nature. First, it speaks to a "trust" issue.  Not only do you question their trustworthiness, but you assign a wrong motive to their deed or words. God alone knows the heart motive and sees their intent.  We are better served by extending grace (undeserved favor) to the person and let God bring conviction when it is necessary regarding the circumstances.

In Oswald Chamber's The Utmost for His Highest, he writes the following,

"The average Christian is the most penetratingly critical individual... the Holy Ghost is the only One in  the true position to criticize, He alone is able to show what is wrong without hurting and wounding... There is no getting away from the penetration of Jesus. If I see the mote in your eye, it means I have a beam in my own. Every wrong thing that I see in you, God locates in me. Every time I judge, I condemn myself (see Romans 2:17-20)."

If I examine my spouse's motives, I risk projecting my own thought process onto their actions.  If I tend to be a bit more defensive when confronted - I might unfairly assign defensiveness to his words or body language. If I downplay their enthusiasm for a particular event, plan or purchase - I risk hurting their feelings and injuring the relationship.  I must stop criticizing the "why" before I know the "what".

Make certain that you refrain from lashing out when you are on the receiving end of criticism and anger. There is often another hidden reason for their outburst and sarcasm. We never really know what has transpired during their day or just before the incident that left you feeling wounded. It might be best to separate yourself for a brief period of time before you respond in a manner that is anything but Christ-like.

I often have to send up one of those "SOS" prayers to the Lord, asking for wisdom and for help with keeping my mouth shut when it is needed.  I don't need to irritate and agitate - I need to disarm and chill out! I need the Holy Spirit to take over and bring calm to a situation that is spiraling out of control.

Extending grace is not focusing on the faults of others - but rather covering them in love. 

Deborah is the author of a Christian non-fiction book titled “Mission Possible”. It is written for women who love the Lord Jesus, but their spouse doesn’t share their passion.  It will encourage and challenge the reader to embrace God’s promises for their spouse and future together. 

Visit  http://www.spirituallyunevenmarriage.com

If you have been encouraged by this post - please take time to share it with others.

You need to check your eye --- I think I see a speck...

What Are You Unpacking?

Where has the time gone?  It is nothing but a blur...

I have sat down several times to write a new post - but I had to put it on the slow-burner.  Life kept getting in the way!

Do you ever feel like that?  You have good intentions and it's all planned out in your head - but then you are forced to re-prioritize, or just nix it altogether...

I once heard a wise saying that I have never forgotten:  "People take precedence over plans!"

Much has happened in the past 3 months since I last wrote to you.  We sold our home and moved into a smaller one --- much smaller.  Downsizing is NOT for the faint-of-heart.  Then we spent a couple of weeks doing some minor renovations including flooring.  That is not an easy task when you are still living in the home!  I am now in the process of unpacking and re-evaluating the necessity of many items as I go through them one by one.  There will undoubtedly be more sold at garage sales, more given away to charity, and more taken to the dump.  My husband and I are settling into our retirement abode - ever so slowly.

In addition to the move, I have also dealt with my Dad having major surgery and the discovery of cancer.  I am the eldest of two daughters and the only one living in close proximity to my parents.  Many family responsibilities and duties have kept me busy over the past several weeks.  As is the case with most aging parents, their adult children are more involved in their day to day care giving and assistance.  I am also still employed part time and have a retired spouse at home.

So - now you know why I haven't been writing lately!  So sorry for the lapse ---

As I take a DEEP BREATH to relieve the stress, I am also giving myself permission to rest and take my time with the whole "unpacking thing".  Moving can stretch any marriage and bring out the worst in your relationship.  God has gently urged me to extend more grace and use more patience while we are settling into our new home.

Unpacking can be exhilarating and exhausting.  Each box opened is a reminder of a memory, an accomplishment, a failure, a dream, a regret... a whole gamut of emotions. One box dredges up memories from when our son was a toddler.  Another box reveals treasures from past travels. Others house rarely used serving pieces and cooking utensils.  How did I acquire so much in 30+ years of marriage?

Oh well... day by day I'm beginning to see the fruits of my labors.  Room by room I'm making progress.  Little by little things are being put away.

So - in the meantime I have given myself permission to post on the Blog as I have time and not stress about it.  My sanity and well-being at home takes priority right now, along with my precious family.

Our son came into town for a week and my granddaughter celebrated her 4th birthday.  Life lived fully is life lived well...

Halloween  is here -  so I am posting this link to a piece I did last year  Trick or Treat

Deborah is the author of a Christian non-fiction book titled “Mission Possible”. It is written for women who love the Lord Jesus, but their spouse doesn’t share their passion.  It will encourage and challenge the reader to embrace God’s promises for their spouse and future together. 

Visit  http://www.spirituallyunevenmarriage.com

What Are You Unpacking?

Love and Marriage - Christ Awaits His Bride...

“For I am jealous for you with godly jealousy. For I have betrothed you to one husband, that I may present you as a chaste virgin to Christ"  (II Corinthians 11:2)

The Apostle Paul  was enamored with Christ and understood the position of trust that had been bestowed on him with regards to His church. He established and nurtured many congregations throughout Asia minor, often referring to them with heartfelt terms of endearment.

Paul also talks extensively about the bride as it relates to the New Testament church. In Ephesians 5:25-27, Paul exhorts husbands to, “...love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself for it, that He might sanctify and cleanse it with the washing of water by the word, that He might present it to Himself a glorious church, not having spot or wrinkle or any such thing, but that it should be holy and without blemish.” 

Wedding customs in the Bible centered on two events:  the betrothal and the wedding. 

On the day of the wedding, the bride dressed in white, elaborately embroidered robes, bedecked herself with jewels, and put on a veil. The bridegroom, attended by friends and accompanied by musicians and singers, went to the bride’s house. After receiving her from her parents, and with their blessing, he conducted the whole wedding party back to his own house. On the way other friends of the bride and groom joined the party with much music and dancing. A feast was held at the bridegroom’s house. Later in the evening, the bride’s parents escorted her to the nuptial chamber where the bridegroom was waiting. Festivities often lasted for several days.

In the Jewish marriage contract there were promises the bridegroom would make to his future bride.

The contract also stated the price he would pay to obtain her. If she agreed, the bridegroom would hand her a cup of wine. If she drank from the cup, the marriage was sealed and they became legally married. He would then say to her, “I will not drink of this cup until we are reunited.”  Jesus Himself said in Matthew 26:29, “But I say to you, I will not drink of this fruit of the vine from now on until that day when I drink it new with you in My Father’s kingdom.”

Jesus performed His first miracle in Cana of Galilee at the wedding of a close relative. 

Jesus was there with His mother, other family members and His disciples (John 2:1-10).  When the servants attending to the feast made it known to His mother that the wine had run out, she in turn approached her son and said, “They have no wine.” Jesus said to her, “Woman, what does your concern have to do with Me? My hour has not yet come.” His mother then told the servants to do whatever He asked. Jesus did eventually intervene on the host’s behalf and miraculously, the six large water-pots, each containing twenty to thirty gallons of water, became filled with wine. The master of the feast then commended the bridegroom for saving the best wine for the end, unlike most weddings, which served inferior wine at the end of the festivities.

For Believers - the New Covenant represents the marriage covenant that will never be broken.  

The New Covenant was sealed with the precious shed blood of Jesus Christ on Calvary.  Jesus gathered with the apostles during His last Passover meal, and as He shared with them the cup and bread, it symbolized the sacrifice He would willingly make to redeem mankind.

In the book of Revelation, John, the beloved also wrote about Christ and His bride [the Church]. He writes, “And I heard, as it were, the voice of a great multitude, as the sound of many waters and as the sound of mighty thunderings, saying, “Alleluia! For the Lord God Omnipotent reigns!  Let us be glad and rejoice and give Him glory, for the marriage of the Lamb has come, and His wife has made herself ready"  Revelation 19:6-9.

So what does a wedding have to do with you and me?

We are the Bride of Christ - the Church.  Individually we are to make ourselves ready for the Bridegroom. We shall be holy and blameless when we stand before Him.  We will not have spot or wrinkle.  Pray that God will prepare us for that day and bring conviction upon His Church for our spirit of indifference and apathy.  Lord Jesus, make us a bride ready for her grand entrance...

Fun Facts:  Why are May and June traditional months for getting married?

It seems in days past that getting married in the late spring had more to do with a bride being "fresh" while the temperatures had not yet reached their summer peak.  Prior to the nineteenth century, daily or weekly bathing was not the norm.  Carrying flowers added a colorful burst and a welcome fragrance for the groom. Additionally, since April frequently brought much precipitation, May and June were dryer months and much cooler than July or August. Thus began the trend of nuptials being held during May and June.

Deborah is the author of a Christian non-fiction book titled “Mission Possible”. It is written for women who love the Lord Jesus, but their spouse doesn’t share their passion.  It will encourage and challenge the reader to embrace God’s promises for their spouse and future together. 

Visit  http://www.spirituallyunevenmarriage.com

If you have been encouraged by this post - please take time to share it with others.

Love and Marriage - Christ Awaits His Bride...

Are You A Caregiver? What About Caring For Your Spouse?

I apologize for a lapse in blog posts recently.  I was functioning in the role of caregiver for close family members during the past two weeks.

As I spent time out of town helping my sister recover after surgery, I began to reflect on what qualities caregivers exhibit most during their time with those they minister to.  Notice I used the word “minister”.

For the Christian, being a caregiver must include not only acts of kindness and mercy, but also walking in the Spirit.  

There is a woman in Scripture who comes to mind when I think of good works and charitable deeds.  In Acts 9:36 Luke tells us about Tabitha (which is translated Dorcas).  She was loved by many and was known for making colorful garments. Dorcas cared for those around her by sewing tunics and sharing them with the less fortunate. When she became sick and died, it was Peter who prayed for her to be revived as a testimony to God’s resurrection power.

In I Corinthians 12:28 the gift of “helps” is listed as essential for the church to function as God designed it.  There is a diversity of Spiritual gifts and callings, but one Spirit.  A gift of mercy and hospitality is necessary in the Body of Christ to care for the flock of God. 

Here are a couple of interesting statistics from the 2009 study funded by the MetLife Foundation for the National Alliance for Caregiving in collaboration with AARP:

-          Half of caregivers say their loved one lives in his or her own home (51%), while 29% live

together with their care recipient.

-          Half of caregivers (53%) also say that their caregiving takes time away from friends and other family members. Those who have sacrificed this time with family and friends are far more likely to feel high emotional stress (47%) than are those who have been able to maintain the time they spend with family and friends (14%).

There are many in the nursing profession that will tell you that it is their “calling” in life.  Nursing is the quintessential service oriented occupation.  It is one based on selflessness and sacrifice. The gifts of mercy and compassion flow effortlessly. I am convinced that there are natural gifts and God ordained gifts that are given to each believer in order to enrich the lives of others.

Patience, longsuffering and gentleness are three of the Spiritual fruits that are often evident in caregivers.

When the Apostle Paul tells us in I Corinthians 13:1-3 that love is the greatest gift, verse 7 lists how difficult loving can really be.  Endurance is the key to bearing up under the weight of love that is tested and tried.  If we have not love – we have nothing to give that is of importance.

Paul also emphasizes in Ephesians 2:10 that we have been created in Christ Jesus for “good works” which God engineered and prepared for us in advance. 

As we draw on our God-given strengths, we are challenged to demonstrate our fruits (Galatians 5:22-23). 

When I consider the time and effort I put into my caregiving duties with family members, I realize that I should do no less for my own husband.  

Women generally don’t have an issue with caregiving – but I have become acutely aware of the fact that I may not always extend the same mercy, longsuffering or patience to my spouse as I would with someone else.  I have been convicted of that very fact since I have returned home to my daily routine and responsibilities.

My husband deserves the same care and concern I would show for any other family member in need.  So why do I often dismiss his needs, but run to help someone else? 

May God continue to help me prioritize and submit to His plan for utilizing my caregiving gifts at home.  I don’t want to discover later on that I let my own agenda sideline God’s plan for being a loving and care centered wife in my own household.

Can I get a witness here?  Do you struggle with caregiving in your family and at home? What helps you stay God-centered as you minister to your loved ones?

Deborah is the author of a Christian non-fiction book titled “Mission Possible”. It is written for women who love the Lord Jesus, but their spouse doesn’t share their passion.  It will encourage and challenge the reader to embrace God’s promises for their spouse and future together. 

Visit  http://www.spirituallyunevenmarriage.com

If you have been encouraged by this post - please take time to share it with others.

Are You A Caregiver? What About Caring For Your Spouse?

The Love Boat - Don't Miss It !

Okay - I'm showing my age here...

The Love Boat

                  
Some of us remember watching this funny show every week in anticipation of the next exciting relationship or failed love attempt. Each member of the crew had a role in fulfilling the guests’ wishes and plans aboard their majestic vessel.  Nothing was too difficult for the stewards, cruise director or the Captain.

What if you were expecting to take a romantic cruise on Valentine's Day?  Think of all the planning, preparations and care you would take to make sure everything was perfect!  Can you just picture it?

You might tuck away a surprise card and a little sweet treat for your man.  You probably packed that silky red blouse and little black skirt, along with the glitzy shoes for dinner. Maybe you grabbed that gorgeous necklace he bought you last year for your birthday to proudly wear that evening. 

Wow – so much preparation goes into your vacation, but how about your Spirit woman?  

I Peter 3:3-4 says, “Do not let your beauty be that outward adorning of arranging the hair, of wearing gold, or of putting on fine apparel; but let it be the hidden person of the heart, with the incorruptible ornament of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is very precious in the sight of God.”

Valentine’s Day is all about showing love to your spouse, parents, children, and those you care about the most.  As a Christian woman there is only one way to love your husband… with the love of Christ.  This Valentine’s Day give your Heavenly Father a gift that will keep on giving – namely – the decision to love your husband as God intended while you are living in a spiritually mismatched marriage.

What is love?  In the Greek New Testament there are (4) forms of the word "love" ~

Physical Love (eros)  The common Greek word from which English derives the term erotic, which is properly used to describe the love of physical attraction when it is between married couples (e.g. Song of Solomon).

Family Love (storge)  The fondness people share for their relatives, especially love between parents and children. Can also refer to great affection such as Paul’s passage in Romans 12:10, “be kindly affectionate to one another” which combines storge with philo (philostorgos).

Affectionate Love (philia)  This is a form of love that is not commanded by God, but rather based on our reaction to different types of people – brotherly love. 

Love of Choice (agape)   This is the love of God – and is what God calls us to do at His command – by choice.  It is love of the highest order.  In John 3:16 the verb “loved” expresses this concept of agape.

Let’s assume for the sake of our example that we would already love our husband with the physical, family, and affectionate love.  Often what is the most difficult thing to do is to love them with God’s agape love. 

Below is an excerpt from my book “Mission Possible” Chapter 4 - Painful Reality

As a “child of light”, you begin to see life differently through God’s filter.  Things of the world no longer satisfy, excite, or challenge you. Your sights are set higher. Part of that is reflected in your relationship – as a wife, friend and lover. There unfortunately are things that you begin to dislike about him. We are to “love the sinner, but hate the sin.”

                
           There were times I had to pray, “Lord, give me a desire for my husband… help me to love him with Your love, because I don’t like him very much right now.” Remember, you have to “take every thought captive, unto the obedience of Christ” (II Corinthians 10:5). Give it to God and then you will have peace.     (Copyright  © Deborah McCarragher and God Mission Possible, 2010-2016)

Colossians 3:12-14 exhort us to “…put on tender mercies, kindness, humility, meekness, longsuffering, forgiveness and above all – put on love, which is the bond of perfection.”  Paul admonishes us to put on, by a deliberate effort, those things which exhibit the very nature of God.  That is what is truly attractive to our spouses and the world outside. “Charm is deceitful and beauty is vain, but a woman who fears the Lord, she shall be praised.”  (Proverbs 31:30)

This Valentine’s Day, whether you go on a cruise to an exotic location, or if you are at home for the holiday, be sure to show your husband God’s love in your words, actions and thoughts.  Pray for God to bless him and to reveal Himself to him in an unusual way. 

Our husband is our gift from above – our completer, not our competitor. God wants our focus to be on our spouse and our marriage on that special day that many celebrate LOVE.

Enjoy this blast from the past - The Love Boat theme song!

Deborah is the author of a Christian non-fiction book titled “Mission Possible”. It is written for women who love the Lord Jesus, but their spouse doesn’t share their passion.  It will encourage and challenge the reader to embrace God’s promises for their spouse and future together. 

Visit  http://www.spirituallyunevenmarriage.com

If you have been encouraged by this post - please take time to share it with others.

The Love Boat - Don't Miss It !

Truth or Consequences? You Have A Choice...

There are sins and there are secret sins - but there are no hidden sins from the Lord.

Is there something you'd rather not reveal to your family about your past?  Perhaps you stuffed a personal memory deep down into your psyche - hoping it would never surface again. 

Are you staring full-face at the consequences of your past sin?  Maybe you came from a background full of cheap and dishonorable actions. News Flash:  God already knows about it...so confess it and move forward!

There may be a situation in your marriage that will require a hard choice to be made. Your spouse might have done something that deeply hurt or offended you, and now you are faced with a dilemma: respond in a Christ centered way, or the world's way, which inevitably leads to remorse.  

You may be harboring resentment towards God for something you think He should have done differently in your marriage or family.  Maybe you're upset because you were sure you heard from God, and now you doubt yourself and His plans for you. 

It's time for Truth or Consequences - God's Way

Here's a great example of what happens when we allow ourselves to be disillusioned...

In II Samuel 12:1-12, King David was confronted by the prophet Nathan over his horrific sin.  This included lusting after and taking another man's wife, purposing to frame him for the pregnancy, and eventually plotting to kill him to cover up his own sin.  David was oblivious to the fact that it was him that the prophet was speaking of in the story he was telling the King.  God directed Nathan to tell David, "You are the man!" 

After declaring to David that God had indeed blessed him, and would have done even more to exalt him in the eyes of Israel, Nathan proceeded to deliver an admonishment to the King directly from God, and pronounce a prophesy of doom on him and his household for the evil he had done. David was at a crossroads and he had a choice to make.  He admitted the secret sins and wailed, "I have sinned against the LORD."   

At that moment, Nathan said to him, "The LORD also has put away your sin; you shall not die.  However, because by this deed you have given great occasion to the enemies of the LORD to blaspheme, the child also who is born to you shall surely die."  It was a horrendous penalty to pay for his sins, and it involved an innocent victim.  King David chose rightly because he admitted his sin and accepted the consequences. He knew who God was and His righteous character.

David wrote many of the stirring Psalms that we so dearly embrace and recite in times of despair.  He used the time of restoration after his fall from grace to extol the virtues and mercies of God for all to reflect upon.  He spent countless nights praising his LORD and giving thanks for the mighty hand that guided him into truth and grace, as he sought to live out his days as a "man after God's own heart."   David pleaded with God to punish him, but not the child.  However, God's Word stood and David accepted the consequence.  He showed a level of maturity that we need to embrace.  What David did right was to "shut himself in with God" and reflect on what had transpired.  

II Samuel 12:17-18 tells us that David spent one week quiet before the LORD, and didn't even leave his house!  When you are distressed and in deep despair, get alone with God and His Word.  Do some true soul searching.  Bring all of your hurts and disappointments to Him. He will regenerate your thinking to line up with His thoughts, and align your will with His.  Instead of letting disappointment overtake him, David ultimately accepted the circumstances and praised God for them.  


What took place next is amazing.  Verse 20 tells us that, "David arose from the ground, washed and anointed himself, and changed his clothes; and he went into the house of the LORD and worshiped."  

David arose in the newness of God's grace, and came forth from the grave of self-pity and defeat.  

He was regenerated by God's promises and the timeless truths from His Word.  David was sure he would see his son again in the ages to come. He confidently said, “While the child was still alive, I fasted and wept; for I said, ‘Who can tell whether the Lord will be gracious to me, that the child may live?’ “But now he is dead; why should I fast? Can I bring him back again? I shall go to him, but he shall not return to me.”  David forgave himself and was at peace with God once again.

Isaiah 61:3 declares the LORD will, "console those who mourn in Zion, to give them beauty for ashes, the oil of joy for mourning, the garment of praise for the spirit of heaviness..."   Psalm 30:5 states, "For His anger is but for a moment, His favor is for life; weeping may endure for a night, but joy comes in the morning."  

David saw the dawn of a new day in God's sovereignty.

When we have come face to face with a crisis that tears at the very core of your being, that is when we must go to God and lean on His mercies, and gain strength from Who He Is.  Rest assured that His grace will be sufficient and His power adequate to sustain you in your weakness (II Corinthians 12: 9-10).


There is freedom in forgiveness. May we also be gracious towards God and release Him from our human judgments and expectations. 

Bless the Lord oh my soul…

Deborah is the author of a Christian non-fiction book titled “Mission Possible”. It is written for women who love the Lord Jesus, but their spouse doesn’t share their passion.  It will encourage and challenge the reader to embrace God’s promises for their spouse and future together. 

Visit  http://www.spirituallyunevenmarriage.com

If you have been encouraged by this post - please take time to share this post with others.

Truth or Consequences? You Have A Choice...

Is that an Oasis I see or just a Mirage?

courtesy  Photocrave.net 

When you find yourself roaming the wilderness or wandering in the desert, don't you normally seek out an oasis?

So why do we act as though one doesn't exist? Do we walk by faith and not by sight?  Don't we gravitate 'by default' towards ease and comfort? Does not our Heavenly Father encourage us in His Word to seek refreshment and reinvigorate ourselves in His Presence?

Refresh:  to restore strength; to revive; to replenish and renew supply.

When you are living in an unequally-yoked marriage, there will be times of weariness and discouragement.  Day to day interaction with someone who is not governed by God’s Spirit can begin to ‘chip away’ at your Christian character.  You often wrestle with yourself over a harsh word spoken, or perhaps you were misunderstood and you now harbor resentment.

I can tell you there were times when I literally felt as though I would scream out loud if I couldn't hand over to God my fickle feelings or raging emotions.  On one occasion I remember going into the bathroom, shutting the door behind me, and just gritting my teeth and shaking my head in disgust at the anger welling up inside of me.  I was emotionally out of control…

I am a student of Satan’s trickery and deception.  I keep my spiritual antenna up when I am in a heated discussion with my husband, because I know the enemy would love for me to say something horrid or disrespect him by marginalizing his opinion.  I find myself thinking, “This is so unfair, Lord! I’m tired of biting my tongue all the time!”

But lately – I have found myself in the wilderness of uncertainty and the desert of uneasiness. I am increasingly thirsty for something I am not getting in my marriage.  I crave spiritual intimacy.  I long for a oneness that only comes from sharing God things.  I have become parched in my soul…

What would you do in this situation?  Do you know where to go for help?

Here is the great news – Jesus is the Living Water (John 4:13-14).  Ephesians 5:26 tells us that God sanctifies and washes us by the water of His Word.  We are refreshed and revived as His life-giving Spirit cleanses our hearts and minds. 

Image credit: 123RF Stock Photo

What does all of this have to do with me and my thirsty soul?  Simply put… Everything.  I must take the time to find my oasis.  I must force myself to rest and seek solitude with my Savior.  I need to separate myself from the world and its influence long enough to refresh myself in Him.

Jeremiah passionately preached that the people had forsaken their God, the fountain of living waters (Jeremiah 2:13).  He also lamented that when they tried to fabricate their own vessels [cisterns], they were inadequate and broken.  

An earthly jar fashioned by man simply cannot contain a heavenly commodity designed by God.

Isaiah tells us that Israel will be comforted by God’s great power of restoration.  Isaiah 43:19-20 declares how God will cut through the wilderness and provide life-saving water to His chosen.  Streams in the desert will spring forth, and rivers will flow unhindered.  In Chapter 44 Isaiah says, “For I [God] will pour water on him who is thirsty, and floods on the dry ground; I will pour My Spirit on your descendants, and My blessing on your offspring.”

God will always provide in miraculous ways when we are no longer able to by means of our own ability.

Moses discovered God’s faithfulness and provision in the Wilderness of Shur, the very place where Hagar and Ishmael lingered after leaving Abraham’s household (Genesis 16:7-14).  Often God’s greatest miracles are seen in the realm of physical impossibilities.  He uses bitter, lifeless things to bring forth life-giving refreshment. 

Do you have something in your spiritually mismatched marriage that needs refreshing?  Is there an attitude or unsettled feeling that you desire relief from?  How have you handled a wilderness experience in your home?

I am discovering that ‘pressing into’ Jesus – the Word of Life - will indeed enrich my life and restore my strength to continue my journey.  What about you?

Deborah is the author of a Christian non-fiction book titled “Mission Possible”. It is written for women who love the Lord Jesus, but their spouse doesn’t share their passion.  It will encourage and challenge the reader to embrace God’s promises for their spouse and future together. 

Visit  http://www.spirituallyunevenmarriage.com

Is that an Oasis I see or just a Mirage?

Are You Feeling the Heat Yet?

When God wants to purify us it’s often by means we’d rather not acknowledge.  Not only that, it may be done through people we are not especially enamored with. 

Malachi 3:2 states “But who can endure the day of His coming? And who can stand when He appears? For He is like a refiner’s fire and like fullers’ soap.”  

Matthew 3:11-12 tells us the Lord Himself will baptize us with the Holy Spirit and fire, and that the “chaff” will be burned up with unquenchable fire at the last Day.

Of course, right now God will refine us when it is required - no need to wait until the Judgment.  If we are His child, and we continue to walk in the flesh, He will “turn up the heat” (so to speak).  We won’t get away with bad behavior without correction.  After all, He lovingly corrects and rebukes those He loves (Revelation 3:19).

Do you notice when God begins to knock off the rough edges of your character?  What does He do to curtail your gruff attitudes? How does God interfere in your life when things don’t go your way?

One of my favorite devotionals is My Utmost for His Highest by Oswald Chambers.  An entry in September reads in part as follows:

   Our call has nothing to do with personal sanctification, but with being made broken bread and poured-out wine. God can never make us wine if we object to the fingers He uses to crush us with. If God would only use His own fingers, and make me broken bread and poured-out wine in a special way! But when He uses someone whom we dislike, or some set of circumstances to which we said we would never submit, and makes those the crushers, we object.  If ever we are going to be made into wine, we will have to be crushed; you cannot drink grapes.

Does this resonate with you?  Do you “feel the squeeze” and wonder what on earth God is up to?  Are there are times when He has to put us between a rock and a hard place just to get our attention?

It might be a neighbor He uses to point out something we didn't realize was offensive. Or how about your siblings?  They know you better than almost anyone on the planet.  What happens when God uses them to pinpoint an attitude that is less than God-honoring?  He often uses our spouses to prick our consciences.  Or perhaps our employer brings something to our attention that God uses to correct us.  

However the rebuke comes - let the Refiner burn away all that remains of your "old nature" in order to bring forth something better - something pure.

In marriage, we often have periods in our relationship where God is working on one of us, while the other seems to “get a pass”.  If you are in an unequally-yoked marriage, your squeeze can be especially painful to endure. The believer knows that God might hone in on their character or brings them under conviction in an area they think they have already conquered.  That can be difficult to accept unless we understand that ultimately the greater goal is to refine us, define us, and bring Him glory.

The Apostle Paul tells us in Romans 8:18 “For I know that in me (that is, in my flesh) nothing good dwells; for to will is present with me, but how to perform what is good I do not find.”  He goes on to say that even though he wills to do good, he does not do it. The sin that dwells in him commits the sin.  His body is in conflict with his mind, and thus he is brought captive unto his sinful nature.  He wrestles with a dilemma we all face.  

Victory lies in submission to the Spirit of God by taking every thought captive unto the obedience of Christ (2 Corinthians 10:5).  Listen to the still small voice.  Ask another believer to agree in prayer with you about your shortcomings and how to overcome them.  Recite Scriptures that reinforce Godly behaviors and thinking.

God's teachings are truths that can only be understood by His Spirit within us. Make sure they are deeply embedded within your mind and soul.  Your relationships depend on it.

Deborah is the author of a Christian non-fiction book titled “Mission Possible”.  It is written for women who love the Lord Jesus, but their spouse doesn’t share their passion.  It will encourage and challenge the reader to embrace God’s promises for their spouse and future together.  Visit

http://www.spirituallyunevenmarriage.com

Are You Feeling the Heat Yet?