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Daughter of the King - born from above in 1989.

Deborah grew up in a military family and moved to Florida in the early 1970's.  She began her journey of creative writing soon after coming to know Jesus as her personal Savior. Her primary goal is to share her personal testimony with others while bringing hope and practical help through her writing.

Tuesday, May 12, 2015

A Spiritual "Tug-O-War"

Do you feel as though you are in a spiritual tug-o-war? 

When you are living in an unequally-yoked marriage, there will be times when you feel as though you are being pulled in two different directions...

Do you struggle as I do with everyday occurrences that remind you of a scene in "Clash of the Titans"?  This epic story of good versus evil is found in many books, movies and fairy tales. So how does that correlate to a spiritually mismatched marriage?  

The Apostle Paul appeals to believers in II Corinthians 6:14 as follows: "Do not be unequally yoked together with unbelievers. For what fellowship has righteousness with lawlessness? And what communion has light with darkness?"  His main focus was on everyday life choices including friendships, commerce and social activities. Christians are supposed to be separated unto the Lord to maintain a witness to an unsaved world.

However, he also lays out Godly principles in I Corinthians 7:10-16 regarding believers married to non-believers. He sums up with this: "For how do you know, O wife, whether you will save your husband? Or how do you know, O husband, whether you will save your wife?" 

Just remember this... ... He who is in you is greater than he who is in the world (I John 4:4). 

First and foremost we must maintain our connection with Jesus Christ and feed our spiritual man [woman]. The world contends for our attention. This quote from C.H. Spurgeon's "Morning and Evening" says it all:  "It is the incessant turmoil of the world, the constant attraction of earthly things, that takes the soul away from Christ".

Be sure that you make time to charge your spiritual battery. You need to stay in fellowship with Jesus in order to live a Christ-centered life at home. Here is one of my Blog posts from the past that explains what I mean:  Exercise Profits Nothing


Next, don't view your spouse as the enemy. Remember they don't yet know the Lord as you do. They are spiritually "dead" to the things of God. In my book MISSION POSSIBLE - Chapter 2 The "Abigail Syndrome", I explain it this way:

"The world does make man like stone and cold to the things of God. Pray for your husband as in Ezekiel 36:26: "I will give you a new heart and put a new spirit within you; I will take the heart of stone out of your flesh and give you a heart of flesh."  His spiritual death needs to be recognized by his flesh. When your husband dies to himself, it will be so God can raise him up with "resurrection power" to be the Godly priest of your home [God] intended!"  Copyright © Deborah McCarragher and God Mission Possible, 2010-2015 


Lastly, dwell with your mate in harmony as much as is possible. When my husband wants to watch something on TV that "grates" on my spirit, I just go upstairs to my office and watch something else. Having a heated discussion on what he wants to watch versus what I want to watch only leads to further division. We watch plenty of TV together - so I've learned to choose my battles carefully. 

Do what you can to live in peace. Give and take. Hold your tongue. Defer to your spouse's choices when practical and wait for an appropriate time to discuss your concerns. I wrote a Blog post on this subject here: Can't We All Just Get Along?

If you think you're going to "blow a gasket" - go for a walk. Step into another room and say an SOS prayer. Make provision for quality time for yourself. That way you'll be less likely to react in a dishonorable way.

Don't let the "tug-o-war" become a win or lose scenario. You can win by letting God have His way in your life and peace in your home.







Deborah is the author of a Christian non-fiction book titled “Mission Possible”. It is written for women who love the Lord Jesus, but their spouse doesn’t share their passion.  It will encourage and challenge the reader to embrace God’s promises for their spouse and future together. 

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Tuesday, April 21, 2015

Is Your Testimony - Open Mouth and Insert Foot?

Yep - I had to bite my tongue... again.

Never return evil for evil or insult for insult... but on the contrary blessing - praying for their welfare, happiness and protection, and truly pitying and loving them. For know to this you have been called, that you may yourselves inherit a blessing (from God) - obtain a blessing as heirs, bringing welfare and happiness and protection. (I Peter 3:9 AMP)

I suppose I'm the only one that routinely visits this scenario. I'm having to once again swallow my pride, humble myself and return a kind word in exchange for a gruff remark.

"Did he get up on the wrong side of the bed again?" I ask myself.  Why do I feel that any little thing sets him off like a firecracker? Lord, I'm tired of getting my feelings hurt and my ego bruised again. Why must I always be the one to back down and extend grace?

Yes - I'm being melodramatic here for a reason.  First of all, when we continuously refer to ourselves and our feelings as we complain to the Lord, we are in effect answering in the rhetorical because we already know what the answer is.  We are Christians and we don't act like the world. We are to act like Christ.


A soft answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.  (Proverbs 15:1)


Here is a brief excerpt from my book  MISSION POSSIBLE   
Chapter 6   In The Meantime - Serve

I Peter 5:7 says, [in humility] "casting all your care upon Him, for He cares for you." Sometimes we have many concerns and burdens to cast upon Him. There are days we must ask God to forgive us for an attitude that is less than honorable. When my husband hurt me with a comment or action, I would find myself saying to God, "Forgive him, Lord, for he knows not what he does."  

We cannot afford to hold a grudge and give place to the devil. We must be peacemakers.  Matthew 5:9 says, "Blessed are the peacemakers, for they shall be called sons of God."  Love is the "bond of perfection" and you must "let the peace of God rule in your hearts..." (Colossians 3:14-15). We need to remind ourselves that "we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this age, against spiritual hosts of wickedness in the heavenly places" (Ephesians 6:12).  Your husband is not the enemy - Satan is!    © 2010-2015




I was listening to a sermon the other day via a pod cast by a well-known pastor. He was teaching on the subject of repentance with reference to the crowds that surrounded Peter as he was preaching during Pentacost. His boldness had dramatically increased after the Holy Spirit had empowered him and the other disciples. The Apostle Peter confronted them with the death of the promised Messiah and their own sin (Acts 2:36-41).

Paul writes to the Corinthians telling them that he rejoiced in the fact that their sorrow led them to a true repentance that in turn led to salvation (2 Corinthians 7:9-10).  I began to see with my spiritual eyes that godly sorrow in me would produce true repentance - not just "lip service" to the Lord.  My actions needed to align themselves with what I was "saying I would change." Christians have to repent too! 

I needed to turn from my former ways of coping with the difficulties in my marriage to a more Godly response that was born from a pure heart's motive.

Thankfully Jesus is a God of second chances. He knows our frailties. He sees our innermost struggles. If we ask Him for strength, perseverance, and wisdom He will oblige us in our request. Purpose to submit yourself to His plans and His ways. Remember, taking on His yoke is easier than trying to do it all by yourself (Matthew 11:29-30).

Speaking of submission - always view it from the perspective of submitting to Jesus. That will help you as your spouse's helpmeet to do what is required by the Lord to preserve harmony and a safety zone within your marriage.  Here is a link to one of my popular posts about submission:  Oh No - Not the S Word .

So tell me - what is your greatest stumbling block in your spiritually mismatched marriage?  Do you cry out to the Lord in frustration?  Have you seen a rise in spiritual tension in your home?

Stay on your knees... that just might be a sign of a pending breakthrough in the heavenlies...







Deborah is the author of a Christian non-fiction book titled “Mission Possible”. It is written for women who love the Lord Jesus, but their spouse doesn’t share their passion.  It will encourage and challenge the reader to embrace God’s promises for their spouse and future together. Visit  http://www.spirituallyunevenmarriage.com

If you have been encouraged by this post - please take time to share it with others.

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