About The Author

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Daughter of the King - born from above in 1989.

Deborah grew up in a military family and moved to Florida in the early 1970's.  She began her journey of creative writing soon after coming to know Jesus as her personal Savior. Her primary goal is to share her personal testimony with others while bringing hope and practical help through her writing.

Thursday, February 23, 2012

Do You Make Others "Beg" for Forgiveness?


You might not do it verbally.  You might not even mean to - but your actions say it loud and clear.  You might as well tell them to get down on one knee and start begging...

Forgiveness is one of those words we just look at and squirm a little.  You might have a history of "hurts" in your marriage or in your family that just keeps getting in the way of real progress towards forgiveness.  Things said and done during heated discussions.  A forgotten birthday or anniversary.  A bad business decision or a regret over financial mishaps in your marriage can produce an unforgiving spirit. How about betrayal or lying?  What do you do with repeated anger, resentment, and yes - even hatred?


To better understand forgiveness, lets look at its root definition:  to cease to feel resentment against an offender; to pardon.  We have to understand it from God's perspective (Psalm 86:5). When God forgives, it's for good.  It's complete. It's final.  It's gone with no trace of having ever been there (Isaiah 43:25). No dredging up the past; no looking for leftovers, and nothing to retrieve from the hard drive. Zero - Zip!

Can you and I forgive that way?  No - not in our own strength or by our own volition. We can only forgive as Christ does when He lives in our hearts and works in our lives.  As believers, we have been freed from the bondage that unforgiving can cause. Because of Christ we can forgive.  He exhibited the ultimate forgiveness when He hung on the cross for our sins. He purchased our right to be forgiven and modeled forgiveness (Luke 23:34). 


In II Corinthians 2:6-8 the Apostle Paul instructed the Corinthians to forgive someone who has caused grief due to their sin against fellow believers.  His point was to forgive him so that he would not be overcome with too much sorrow, and thus not be received again back into fellowship with God, and ultimately once again within the church.  In marriage, to forgive is to restore hope, and that is essential in moving past the hurt.


You give up the right to your own hurt and disappointment when you forgive someone. You give yourself permission to move on - to release them and the offense.  Healing can take place in a relationship when you both move from bitterness to forgiveness 

Love and trust can be restored where forgiveness is cherished and pardon is practiced.  

So, how do you keep on forgiving when you're faced with attending a repeat performance year after year?  Can't you just get past it already?  Why do we keep holding on to the same bad memories and heartaches, as though they provide some sort of sadistic satisfaction or revenge?  

Jesus told his disciples in Matthew 18:21-22 to not even consider how many times to forgive, but to have a genuine heartfelt spirit of forgiveness towards others without preconceived parameters.  In other words, keep on forgiving as your heavenly Father extends His mercy towards you. 

Please don't misunderstand me -  I don't condone spousal abuse or mental cruelty, but oftentimes we do have to extend grace far beyond what we would like to.  


Forgiveness is one of those things that takes on a life of itself;  when we walk in the Spirit - we have a supernatural ability from God to practice it in reality.

I personally like to try to live each day as a brand new opportunity, to put behind me the things that I have already forgiven, and move forward with a clean slate. I refuse to let Satan wreck havoc in my marriage where it isn't even warranted.  I have enough to deal with without opening the door to more misunderstandings and misconceptions in our relationship.

 In closing - I'll share these nuggets:

Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you. The Apostle Paul (Ephesians 4:32)
 
He who cannot forgive breaks the bridge over which he himself must pass.  ~ George Herbert 

"I can forgive, but I cannot forget," is only another way of sayings, "I will not forgive."  
~ Anonymous

A Christian will find it cheaper to pardon than to resent.  Forgiveness saves the expense of anger, the cost of hatred, the waste of spirits.  ~ Hannah More

Never does the human soul appear so strong and noble as when it forgoes revenge and dares to forgive an injury.  ~ E.H. Chapin



 


 
 Deborah is the author of a Christian non-fiction book titled “Mission Possible”.  It is written for women who love the Lord Jesus, but their spouse doesn’t share their passion.  It will encourage and challenge the reader to embrace God’s promises for their spouse and future together.  Visit


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Thursday, February 16, 2012

Anger Management God's Way

Why can't you act civil?  Don't talk to me that way! Didn't you hear what I said?  I'm not yelling... I'm making a point!

How often do conversations and remarks get out of hand at your house?  If you're in a spiritually uneven marriage things can escalate rapidly.  What happens when you just don't see eye to eye?  I don't necessarily expect you to answer me - but I do know one thing...we all lose our tempers and react instead of acting with self-control.

Anger is a menacing thing - it simmers and stews and boils over.  It produces toxic poisons that seep into a relationship unless you take measures to stop it. There are many Scriptures concerning anger. Here's a sampling of them:

It is better to be slow-tempered than famous; it is better to have self-control than to control an army. ~Solomon (Proverbs 16:32)

A man without self-control is as defenseless as a city with broken-down walls.  ~Solomon (Proverbs 25:28)

A rebel shouts in anger; a wise man holds his temper in and cools it.  ~Solomon (Proverbs 29:11)

Self-control means controlling the tongue! A quick retort can ruin everything.   ~Solomon (Proverbs 13:3)

A wise man controls his temper. He knows that anger causes mistakes.  ~Solomon (Proverbs 14:29)

A soft answer turns away wrath, but harsh words cause quarrels.  ~Solomon (Proverbs 15:1)

If you are angry, don't sin by nursing your grudge. Don't let the sun to down with you still angry - get over it quickly;  for when you are angry you give a mighty foothold to the devil.  ~Apostle Paul (Ephesians 4:26-27)

Stop being mean, bad-tempered and angry. Quarreling, harsh words, and dislike of others should have no place in your lives.  ~Apostle Paul (Ephesians 4:31)

(All Scripture quoted is from The Living Bible - TLB)

Whether you are in a Christian marriage or in an unequally-yoked marriage, if you are a child of the King, you possess a different set of anger management skills than a non-believer.  God has equipped you with Spiritual sensitivity and an important component of your fruit of the Spirit; namely self-control.  

The Apostle Paul lists self-control last in the fruit array - but certainly not least (Galatians 5:22-23).  This particular quality enables the believer to mentally "pause in the heavenlies" before acting out in the flesh.  Christ in us provides us with a check in our Spirit man and the power to overcome our flesh in a time of weakness. Simon Peter writes in his epistle about our growth in the Lord, citing self-control as one of the keys to being fruitful in your walk in and in the knowledge of Jesus Christ (II Peter 1:5-8).

 So - what do you intend to do with your your anger?  How about no retaliation?  How about bury it in the sea of forgetfulness?  How about trading it in for constraint? 


Below is an excerpt from Mission Possible - Chapter 4 ~ Painful Reality

 "Many times, in discouragement I would say, "God, I can't do this anymore; I'm too tired."  Then I would hear God speak to my heart, "Yes, I know you are...just rest in Me and leave this at My altar.  My grace is sufficient for you...My strength is made perfect in your weakness" (II Corinthians 12:9).  He would say "Come to Me, all you who labor and are heavy laden [weary], and I will give you rest" (Matthew 11:28). Verse 29 specifically says "rest for your souls." 

When you are weary from the battle and tired of the struggles in your marriage, what Bible verse brings you guidance and comfort?









Deborah is the author of a Christian non-fiction book titled “Mission Possible”.  It is written for women who love the Lord Jesus, but their spouse doesn’t share their passion.  It will encourage and challenge the reader to embrace God’s promises for their spouse and future together.  Visit http://www.spirituallyunevenmarriage.com

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Friday, February 10, 2012

Valentine's Day - Do You Have That "Loving Feeling"?

Love is in the air... 

But is it in your marriage?  Do you demonstrate your love to your husband in the little things you do?  Does he see your love in action - even in the private moments?

Ephesians 5 commands us to walk in love towards one another. Paul was teaching on submitting to one another in the fear of God (verse 21). Husbands are admonished to love their wives just as Christ loved the church. The great mystery Paul talks about not only has to do with the “leaving and cleaving” in a physical union between and man and woman, but also of Christ and His Church. We leave the world and cleave unto Him.

When we marry, we forsake all others for our husband. We are his alone. Just as Israel played the harlot and was unfaithful to God, we too can become “unfaithful” in our marriage concerning our allegiance to our spouse. Our husband is our gift from above – our  completer, not our competitor. God wants our focus to be on our mate and our marriage. 

Paul’s last point in Ephesians 5 is, “Let each one of you in particular so love his own wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband.”  This is the point:  women generally have no problem “loving” – but they often have difficulty “respecting” their husband. Honor and respect goes a long way in forging a lasting and healthy relationship. This applies whether you are both Christians, or if you are unequally-yoked in your marriage. God wills that the wife love and respect her husband.

The message that was given to the church at Ephesus in the book of Revelation was to the point and quite startling.  Jesus acknowledged their works, labor, patience and endurance. He commended their perseverance, but He also reprimanded them for one important thing:  they left their first loveHe told them to repent and do the first works.  

That got me to thinking...  If you don't abandon your first Love, you won't abandon your second love (your spouse).  Christ is the key to loving your husband in a way that brings glory to God.


God sent us a Valentine in Jesus...

He demonstrated His own love toward me, that while I was still a sinner, Christ died for me (Romans 5:8).

For God so loved the world (me) that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believed in Him would not perish, but have everlasting life (John 3:16).
  
Behold, what manner of love the Father has bestowed on me, that I should be called a child of God 
(I John 3:1).

By this I know love, because He laid down His life for me (I John 3:16).



Love Is In The Air -  (this will take you back a few years! - Disco style)





Show some love... I shared this list on my  Anniversary Blog Post  (January 2nd 2012)

“30 Things I Love Most About My Husband"
  1. Funny
  2. Romantic
  3. Generous           
  4. Careful
  5. Sacrificial
  6. Organized
  7. Mindful
  8.   (etc...)



Finally - share with me your thoughts on love...

What verse do you claim when you're not  "feeling the love" ?

What verse gives you the grace to love like Christ does in your marriage?




 



Deborah is the author of a Christian non-fiction book titled “Mission Possible”.  It is written for women who love the Lord Jesus, but their spouse doesn’t share their passion.  It will encourage and challenge the reader to embrace God’s promises for their spouse and future together.  Visit



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Thursday, February 9, 2012

Valentine's Day Giveaway Winner Announced (Now Closed)

And the winner is ~

Thank you for your participation in the Valentine's Day Giveaway.  There has been wonderful, insightful sharing here!

Choosing a winner is never easy - I appreciate your heartfelt answers to the questions posed to you.  That being said, reading the diverse comments and variety of answers was encouraging and comforting!


Okay -  drum roll please...

The winner of the Valentine's Day Giveaway is

 Daixin  Lin

Daixin - please email me or reply to your post so I can send you the Giveaway package!

            


Because all of the participants showed "courage" in answering the questions, and shared from the depth of their hearts - I'd like to offer each of you a Free Download of my book "Mission Possible" (ebook format of your choice) from Smashwords.  Just email me at  deb@alabasterboxpublishing.com , and put "Valentine's Day Giveaway" in the Subject Line. 

Thank you all again for visiting my blog God Mission Possible.  You are special to me and the Lord...





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Wednesday, February 1, 2012

Valentine's Day Giveaway - It Takes Courage To Make It !

Valentine's Day is just around the corner.


In honor of NATIONAL MARRIAGE Week  (Feb. 7th -14th)  I'm hosting a giveaway featuring a copy of the new movie COURAGEOUS along with a few other goodies!

Here's what you have to do for a chance to win this Valentine's Day Giveaway package 


Simply answer one of the questions at the end of this devotional on 'Courage', and I'll choose a Winner on February 9th and announce it on this Blog.  Don't forget to write your answer in the "Post a Comment" box (below) and check back for the winner.  I'll be mailing out the gift package right away!


 
 The gift package will include the movie COURAGEOUS on DVD, microwave popcorn, a few Valentine goodies, and a copy of my paperback book MISSION POSSIBLE





"Courage" is showcased in the Bible 

In Joshua Chapter 1 God told Joshua to be courageous before he led the Israelites into the Promised Land.  He commanded him to exhibit courage three separate times. Gideon was also extolled to be courageous in the book of Judges, as was Zerubbabel in the book of Haggai. 

There are also several women in the Bible who were courageous. Three of my favorite examples are Sarah, Moses' mother, and Eunice.  

In Genesis 12 we find Sarai (Sarah) following Abram to Egypt during a time of famine in Canaan.  He convinced her to tell the Egyptians that she was his sister, and not his wife, for fear of losing his life. It took great courage for her to agree to the plan, one in which God Himself intervened.  

Exodus Chapter 2 gives us the story of Moses' mother, who going against orders from the King of Egypt, hid her young son in the bulrushes and trusted God to protect him from harm.  Her courage and obedience led the way for Moses to become the leader of his people, and an instrument of God against Pharaoh.

II Timothy Chapter 1:5 tells us that the Apostle Paul reminded young Timothy of his family heritage, including the fact that his mother Eunice and grandmother Lois were instrumental in his spiritual upbringing.  I conclude that Eunice was courageous in her instruction and example of raising her son as a Jewish believer, while it is widely accepted that Timothy's father was a Greek.

The movie COURAGEOUS is a wonderful story of redemption, renewal and re-commitment to family values and leadership within the home. It's a "feel good" flick for men and women alike. Living in a spiritually mismatched marriage presents its own set of challenges and hurdles to overcome.  This film will minister to both sexes as it helps to define biblical roles within the family unit - especially as it pertains to fathers and husbands.  

Our society has diminished a man's role in his family by often portraying them in a negative light in movies, TV, and commercials.  Hollywood stereotypes and role models have left many longing for the "days of old" when it comes to men and their true worth.  The movie COURAGEOUS  brings a sense of hope and encouragement to families that have struggled with life's twists and turns, and gives men a godly example to emulate.

On of my favorite Bible verses regarding courage is this:  "I would have lost heart, unless I had believed that I would see the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living. Wait on the Lord; be of good courage, and He shall strengthen your heart; Wait, I say, on the Lord!"  (Psalm 27:13-14)

 
Question:

We know it takes COURAGE to live in a spiritually uneven marriage.   

What would you say has been the most courageous thing you have done in your 
marriage with regards to your unsaved spouse?     

                                                                   or

 How does the Lord give you the courage to stay committed to your spouse in your unequally-yoked marriage?


Don't forget to leave your answer in the "Post a Comment" box (below) for a chance to win the Valentine's Day Giveaway package.









Deborah is the author of a Christian non-fiction book titled “Mission Possible”.  It is written for women who love the Lord Jesus, but their spouse doesn’t share their passion.  It will encourage and challenge the reader to embrace God’s promises for their spouse and future together.  Visit




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