All those things are great – but do you know what I bet they would really like? Okay, we already know what “we think they want”, but that’s not all that’s on their mind. I really believe they would like a straight-from-the-heart acknowledgement of how glad you are that you married them to begin with! Give them a “look in the eye” honest thank-you for all that you’ve been through together. Men desire, no, men need our respect and love. Tell them that you’d marry them all over again – that they are just what God designed for you.
Ephesians 5 commands us to walk in love towards one another. The Apostle Paul is teaching on submitting to one another in the fear of God (verse 21). Husbands are admonished to love their wives just as Christ loved the church. The great mystery Paul talks about not only has to do with the “leaving and cleaving” in a physical holy union between and man and woman, but also of Christ and His Church. We leave the world and cleave unto Him. We forsake all others for our Husband. We are His alone. Just as Israel played the harlot and was unfaithful to God, we too can become “unfaithful” in our marriage concerning our allegiance. Our husband is our gift from above – our completer, not our competitor. God wants our focus to be on our spouse and our marriage. That is our highest calling.
Peter lays out God’s perfect plan of submission with regards to women in marriage. I Peter 3 states, “Likewise you wives, be submissive to your own husbands, that even if some do not obey the word, they, without a word, may be won by the conduct of their wives, when they observe your chaste conduct accompanied by fear [respect]." Trusting God and His character is the key to showing respect to your spouse, even when it’s undeserved. God will honor your heart and motive.
When I first met my husband, he had a little garden area off of his patio at his apartment. He grew a variety of roses varying in color and size. I have always loved roses. That first day – he presented me with a lovely single dark red rose. Throughout the years, I have received roses on occasion (one being the birth of our son), but more often than not – I have received beautiful cards for Valentine’s Day displaying red roses on it.
What has touched my heart more than anything else over the years, has been a consistent hand-written note in the card saying that he loved me, and thanking God for me! This gesture of love comes from a man who has yet to make Jesus Christ the Lord of his life. I’m thankful that he sees the heart of God in me. How very humbling… To God be all the Glory!
A Little History About Valentine’s Day -
Valentine greetings were popular as far back as the Middle Ages (written Valentines didn't begin to appear until after 1400), and the oldest known Valentine card is on display at the British Museum. The first commercial Valentine's Day greeting cards produced in the U.S. were created in the 1840s by Esther A. Howland.
Deborah is the author of a Christian non-fiction book titled “Mission Possible”. It is written for women who love the Lord Jesus, but their spouse doesn’t share their passion. It will encourage and challenge the reader to embrace God’s promises for their spouse and future together.